Bring Out Your Greatful Dead

IMG_1036Back to the hohumdrum world. Back to listening to NPR every morning and the tide of news about the government doing this or that that thing that either erodes our rights and outrage of the day or the things that others tell us are the outrage, something small turned into a gigantic issue we all must talk about since potential mass extinction from climate change is so 1979. I turn on the radio and listen to this or that report. “We’re not running out of oil, oh no, we’re printing oil the way we print money, we’re just innovating it out of thin air like everything else we do.” We are indeed becoming a producer nation, and not just handbags and homebrew beer, we’re coming up with The Way Out of our problems, soon there will be a return to the Old Normal, to 2.5 cars in the garage or a kid in every pot, or a gun in the oven and our colours and whites can be washed together and that red thing won’t bleed all over the linen sheets making it look like we spilled an entire plate of spaghetti as we ate in bed watching The Late Show with [whoever NBC hasn’t fired this month]. The world keeps on, as it always has, but why does it feel that so many people are holding their breath expecting something to happen, yet it appears we’ve entered the world of Waiting for Godot, we’re all Gub and Fug or Ned and Nel or whomever as we crouch in the brush expecting word of this or that solution to our many and growing dilemmas.
Returning to the world now means returning to a steady connection to the World Wide Interwebs. I can rest back into my routine of catching up with the Daily Show every other night – “Hahahaha, he is so right! How can no one else see this? Hahahaha” – Oh another award for Colbert? That’s great, we’re the smart ones, we can see what is going on, we just can’t do anything about it because… because… We’re not sure why, but we’re sure it has to do with Millennial Quiverists and Fifty Shades of Gray. I have returned to waiting as I eek out a living, half hoping something happens so I don’t have to fill out this or that form, follow up with this or that phone call, expecting other shoe to drop, or perhaps just waiting for nothing because this is the next day, the day after tomorrow, and it looks the same, except that my debt on one thing is 6.7%, another thing 5%, something else 12% and I need to pay those costs with what I have in order to remain in a good standing with the credit agencies so that my car insurance doesn’t go up or if I seek employment in some corporation that my job prospects won’t be squashed because I missed a payment on my TeeVee and who would hire such a boob who cannot even pay their debtors? Not that I have any additional money. Considering that costs have gone up, one would expect in a rational world that benefits would go up too, but then, those are questions that should remain unanswered, will remain unasked except by hobo-looking professors. So here the news, a few more bombs go off in the world and kill people we’ll never know, a few more laws are passed that screw down the clamps, a few more bills come in the mail. That’s not news, we need to talk about social issues that impact a select few.
IMG_1037It is amazing how far a car can coast in neutral. Especially when it is a flying car of the future… except that that one flew into a tree… We’re in neutral but this sucker will continue to coast and the events are but small parts of the scenery that are passing by our windscreen. The director who has their entire staff quit because they are so incompetent gets promoted. The transit leader who parks trains in a puddle is forgiven with a “everyone makes mistakes” (just 200 million dollars which is OK, because it will be Federal money and we knows how much Republocrats love Federal money). The IRS apologizes. The leadership seems to continue along no matter what, there seems to be fewer repercussions for those in charge and it is The Little People, those who Leona Helmsley said were the only ones who “paid taxes” and while that was a long time ago, few would remember, it seems that this opinion has grown, spread to infect others like the Rage Virus turning all the ruling class infected with a disease of the mind. The opinion of these people is so deranged and out of touch, enumerating the transgressions against logic and counting the vacillations, tracking the contradictions is useless. One only counts these if there is some reason. A therapist may track the times a patient slips, a doctor may itemize this or that, the hospital may charge just so much and maybe more for the same thing as the hospital across town, across the city or state. Unknown what drives our economy unknown what drives the world, and we fear that which we cannot control, so we refuse to name it, collectively, we look away.
According to the scientists, we should be dead. All of us, not just a few. Something something reached a million parts per billion and the air we breath is somewhat worse than the air the dinosaurs inhaled, which considering they’re all dead is perhaps worst than that of smoking a pack of [your brand of unfiltered here]. Seeing how… they’re all dead. However, nothing has happened, yet. Nothing that we have collectively noticed. That is. Which is OK, since I have a lot to do this weekend. I don’t need shit to end yet. I assume neither do you. We still have so much to do, even if it all is stupid.
So the Millennials or generation Y or whatever the fuck the marketing people of X-Box or Mumbai telemarketers are calling them are lazy and obsessed with the iEveryfuckings – the iThings they have been marketed their entire lives…. they want to buy them and use them all the time…. so, I guess score one for David Ogilvy or Kaplin or Yum, Inc? Generation X, the Whatevers, the Generation of fucktards who spoke only in air quotes and farted Daft Punk and retro-80s failed to change things, most didn’t even try, they weren’t given a chance to move into using air quotes in well paid jobs, but this generation was also supposed to be slackers. Shifty little Hootie and the Blowfish-listening numbnuts. Hell, they were moving in with their parents long before the kids of today even thought about it. For a slacker generation, I am not aware of any of my friends who have not been hustling in order to stay employed or otherwise making less than they expected and working twice as hard without any real savings. The generation that was told that benefits were for fools, we had to be consultants, we were Work At Will people, Freeagents(tm) who knew we’d never get just one job, but move about from one job to another as we advance or get board or tire of eating Ramon Noodles raw out of the package with just a little butter but never tire of being Life Long Learners(tn). So these generations, the kids plugged into Friendster and MySpace (kids, ask your older siblings what those are), the grunge-band clerks, these generations are overshadowed by the previous, the Baby Boomers, and that Me Generation not only eclipsed the previous, the kids born during the depression but not old enough to fight in The War, but are holding on to their place in the High Command, allowing a few wiz kids here and there to come forward, think up the new app and reap the bounty but otherwise are holding on to the draining pile of American wealth. The rest of us, we’re just something to consume 5 Hour Energy Drinks in order to work our three jobs nit together.
Perhaps we need to launch a council, those of us from these different branded generations. We cannot allow market segmentation to actually partition us. The older generation has set its sights on divide and conquer, to make us constantly returning to school until we go, ‘well, I guess my degrees are all shit and I’ll become a nurse, they need nurses,’ the Boomers ensuring an endless number of ass-wipes to wipe their actual asses. Gen X, Y and Z… It’s time we stopped fighting over Soundgarden, Pink, and Skrillex, and see if we can stop waiting, hoping, expecting change from a boner-driven, social-issue worshiping, identity-mongering, selfish generation and stop following their dead banks, poison politics, and antique divisions and battle lines drawn so many years ago. We must stop adding “gate” to a scandal, we must stop comparing every conflict to Vietnam, we must stop listening to a system that has gotten old and out of touch even if it has gotten slick and more nimble in its propaganda and social control. There are a lot of good people in every generation, there are plenty hidden in the Baby Boomers, some of the best died young, but this voting bloc, this polarized and fragmented generation must be set aside, retired as they deserve.
If we don’t rest control out of this soon to be senile Me Generation, we can look forward to another lost generation of Generation Aa, Generation Bb, or whatever comes after Z in the marketer’s handbook, as those kids fight us for the Walmart greeter jobs which by then will require a MBA. The radio reports another identity story, Fox News is made fun of by the comedians, the corporations file for tax exemption, and we slip into the future.
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2 thoughts on “Bring Out Your Greatful Dead

  1. From some standup’s routine… Tommy Tiernan?????, anyway:
    ‘we keep being told we owe this, they owe that, the national debt etc etc… why don’t we just find the fuckers we owe this money to…. and kill them?
    Well…. the fuckers we owe money to…. the fuckers we are borrowing it all from are… the Future…
    so, I guess we are making a pretty good job of killing them.

    • Yes, indeed. And if these current generations don’t start doing something we will all be implicated – and I think expect unhappy minions to come back from the future to kick our asses for leaving such a messed up planet. Wait, isn’t that the Terminator film plot?

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